Today is day 63--the last day of my 9th week. I wrote about struggling emotionally a week or so ago, but for the largest part it's been smooth sailing. I haven't really been having "cravings" per se. There's been no distinct point where my body/mind told me that if I had X food, then I would be better, IhavetohavethisfoodNOWdammit. What I have experienced is a consciousness that I was in a situation where, in the past, I would turn to food as a solution. And I've certainly had moments of thinking, "oh, these donuts smell good," or "the caffeine kick from a mocha would wake me up this morning," but there has been no desire to indulge myself. On the tail end of those thoughts has consistently been either an idle shrug because I really don't care, or a momentary pause and the thought, "but I want something else." And since I know very very well what that something else is, the 'craving' dissipates without ever gaining a foothold.
So what do I want?
I want to feel confident, sexy, and desirable. (Yeah, yeah, I know "it's all in your mind", "it's all in your attitude", whatever. This is my list.)
I want to not be scared, when I board a plane, that I will have to ask for a seatbelt extender.
I want to be able to buy a pair of motorcycle chaps off-the-rack. Not that I WANT motorcycle chaps, understand, but I want to be able to.
I want to run the 400 meter (quarter mile) in less than 3 minutes.
I want to feel good about all of my food choices, knowing that they are getting me closer to my goals.
I want to go to England next year and not feel like everyone is looking at me as "that fat American lady."
I want to keep feeling better, and keep feeling like I'm actually making progress in my life instead of watching my life pass me by.
For me, there is no "Finish" to the program. I'm not planning to be "done" with this. I completely changed for it, in every way I could. I can't self-sabotage because that would mean completely changing everything in another direction, and it would take too much work for these habits to fall apart. One habit builds on and protects the others, so the entire set has to fall before I "fail". There's security and there's confidence in doing it this way. It's a sarcastic answer, maybe, but if you change everything it's too much effort to change it back.
Are
you worried you won’t successfully finish the program, and it’s easier
to self-sabotage than fail? - See more at:
http://whole30.com/2013/08/revised-timeline/#sthash.uTEeCUhH.dpuf
Are
you worried you won’t successfully finish the program, and it’s easier
to self-sabotage than fail? - See more at:
http://whole30.com/2013/08/revised-timeline/#sthash.uTEeCUhH.dpuf
Are
you worried you won’t successfully finish the program, and it’s easier
to self-sabotage than fail? - See more at:
http://whole30.com/2013/08/revised-timeline/#sthash.uTEeCUhH.dpuf
Are
you worried you won’t successfully finish the program, and it’s easier
to self-sabotage than fail? - See more at:
http://whole30.com/2013/08/revised-timeline/#sthash.uTEeCUhH.dp"
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